About a year after our son’s suicide, I made a terrible mistake. I stopped crying. I wouldn’t talk about Matthew. I put away all his pictures. I refused to grieve. I put on my ‘happy mask’ and believed the lie that it would simply all go away.
My dear friends, eventually you will have to touch those horrible feelings that you stuff deep into your sub-conscience. They will not melt away, evaporate, or flee the scene, and they will surely eat away at your mental and physical health.
Resolving issues is the key, not repressing them. Take an honest look at where you are in the grieving process. Crying is so cathartic! Weeping is a gift you give to yourself! Get out the photos and cry, cry, cry. Remember the happy years and the happy times together! Talk about your loved one—share the hurt with someone!
Here is a verse of Scripture that I have grown to love and cherish. I love this promise regarding our Heavenly Father, “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Psalms 56:8 NLT
I don’t think there is ever a bottle too big for our God! Share all your hurts with him because he understands your sorrow, and he loves you very much. You are his child, and he’s just waiting for you to talk to him!
“Listen to my voice in the morning, LORD. Each morning I bring my requests to you and wait expectantly.” Psalms 5:3 NLT…..and here are my requests:
And here is my prayer for you today, dear friend: “Oh my people, trust in him at all times. Pour out your heart to him, for God is our refuge.”
Elaine Kennelly
Author & Speaker
”Finding Peace After a Suicide Loss”
It's well!
Oh, how my heart aches for you…an only child…a blessing long after you expected one…and his name is Matthew. We are kindred souls. How I wish we could just sit and cry our hearts out. And you are just starting the journey. I am here for you. Please contact me via my email, elaine@elainekennelly.com and then we can have a personal, written conversation. I am lifting you up in prayer, my dear friend. I am so glad you connected with me. The blog each week will continue to come to you, but each message is for many who are at different stages of their grief journey. You are just beginning…that is why we need to communicate through our emails. …
My son Matthew took his life 8/19/21. He was 18. He was my only child. We were not blessed with him until after 22 years of marriage and I was 42. I am devastated!!!